I wasn’t expecting what I would be hearing this day. Nash told Mona that she heard Angel said that if the new girl would prove to #him that she does really like him, he would court her. I was so disappointed and hurt. It made me want to cry. But I again I tried not to because that would be so weak of me.
I talked to Steffi, #him’s ex-girlfriend a long time ago when we were still in elementary school. She’s really good at giving advice. I learned a lot of stuff even if some of the words that she told me is really hard for me to accept and to learn from it. She’s in her 1st year but she knows a lot of things than me. Of course, she’s got lots of experience. Anyways, she gave me three options : Move on, Go for it, and Stay as you are. When I asked Eena, my cousin and who’s also a friend of hers, she chose “Go for it.” But Steffi chose, Move on even if she’s really into choice letter b, which is Go for it.
My choice? It’s to move on with giving the chance to go for it and to act the same way as I am. The same? Yes. Tomorrow, I’m going to stick up to this : “I’m so happy because of my friends and #him.” I will now think positive. Anjelo told me that I’m always saying “What IFs” and stuff like that. Then, I believe others easily the get jealous quickly. It’s no wonder why #him kinda got turned off. I do believe that he still loves me but is just shy and well, trying to test me and see what my reaction would be if he’ll make me jealous using the new girl. I acted normal, just the quirky me. Nothing happened, except he kept on doing it. Steffi said I need to observe for the next few days. If it still happens, she said I needed to confront him. I agree, though. It’s just I didn’t do what Athena told me to do, she said I needed to talk to #him by staring. #him and I got real close by staring, just looking at each other’s eyes.. and being quickly developed.. and those stuff.
If ever someone asks me if I’m jealous because of #him and the new girl, I’d say, “No. I’m just mad at two people. But not them. I don’t blame the girl.” – I guess it’s pretty reasonable? Ergh. I don’t know. But tomorrow will be better.