Today was the worst day ever. #him proposed to #her at school today. I couldn’t help but cry during the English Speech Fest. It was then, I realized I gave up everything when I started to love him. I realized I needed and supposed to join the Extemporaneous Speaking this year because I made a promise to myself that I would defeat Debra. Last year I was part of it luckily thanks to Sir Von. But what happened? It was all because of #him. #him. #him. I regretted falling in love with him and now they’re together. Like, boyfriend and girlfriend already.
I’m tired of crying. My friends told me he wasn’t worth it and my tears are just wasted because of him. I don’t deserve somebody like him. Some guy out there deserves my love but I just couldn’t find him yet.. Not now. Crying helped me a lot out there at the lobby. And I can’t believe I took #him so seriously. It was so stupid of me.
This afternoon I argued with Nash because I took her joke seriously. She told me that they would have to call #her “Mommy”. Nash, Mona and Pat call me “Mommy” or “Mom” because #him was their “Daddy” or “Dad” and we’re one family. I was so furious that I could out of the building. Before that, Nash told #him that we don’t have anything to do anymore because he chose her and it’s over. #him said that whatever happens, they’re still his daughters. Yeah, whatever. Nash and I were finally okay when it was dismissal and I couldn’t help but play around with her. She’s really nice 🙂
I have one thing in mind though : To change for good. I am going to lose weight and improve my attitude, especially my jealousy and insecurities. I realized, er, that they do make a person real ugly. I’m going to happy. Starting now 🙂